2 Samuel Chapter 14

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October 8, 2025

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 🎭 Joab’s Clever Plan: A Wise Woman Helps the King

Joab, the commander of King David’s army, noticed something important. The king was very sad and missed his son Absalom terribly, even though Absalom had done something very wrong. Joab wanted to help bring them back together, so he came up with a smart plan. Joab traveled to a town called Tekoa and found a very wise woman there. He said to her, “I need your help. Please dress up in mourning clothesᵃ and pretend to be very sad, like someone who has been crying for many days. Go to the king and tell him the story I’m about to teach you.”

🎪 The Woman’s Story

The wise woman went to King David’s palace. When she saw the king, she bowed all the way down to the ground with her face touching the floor—that’s how people showed respect to kings back then! She cried out, “Help me, O king!” King David looked at her with concern. “What’s wrong?” he asked gently. The woman began her sad story: “Oh king, I’m a widow. My husband died, and I had two sons. One day, they were out in the field and got into a terrible fight. There was nobody around to stop them, and one brother accidentally killed the other brother.” She continued, tears in her eyes, “Now my whole family is angry with me! They want me to hand over my living son so they can punish him for what he did. But if they take him away, I’ll have nobody left! My husband’s name will disappear forever, like a candle flame that gets blown out.”

👑 The King Makes a Promise

King David’s heart was touched by her story. “Go home,” he told her kindly. “I’ll make sure you’re protected.” But the woman wasn’t finished. “My lord the king,” she said, “please promise me by Yahweh God that nobody will hurt my son.” King David made a solemn promise: “As surely as Yahweh lives, not a single hair on your son’s head will be harmed!”

🎯 The Woman’s Real Message

Then the wise woman said something surprising: “Please, may I say one more thing to you, my king?” “Go ahead,” David said. “Well,” she said carefully, “if you’re willing to save my son and bring him home, why won’t you bring your own son Absalom home? You’ve been keeping him away, but don’t you miss him? We all make mistakes, and we’re all like water that gets spilled on the ground—you can’t pick it back up. But here’s the amazing thing about God: He doesn’t just give up on people! He finds ways to bring His people back to Him, even when they’ve messed up badly.” The woman’s words were like an arrow that hit right in the king’s heart. She was talking about Absalom!

🕵️ The Truth Comes Out

King David suddenly realized something. “Wait a minute,” he said. “Did Joab tell you to say all this?” The woman smiled a little. “My lord the king, you’re as wise as an angel! Yes, it was Joab who gave me this idea. He wanted to help you see things differently.”

🏠 Absalom Comes Home (Sort Of)

King David called for Joab. “All right,” he said. “You can go bring Absalom back to Jerusalem.” Joab was so happy! He bowed down to the ground and thanked the king. Then he traveled to Geshurᵇ, where Absalom had been hiding, and brought him home. But there was one problem. King David said, “Absalom can come back to Jerusalem, but he must live in his own house. I don’t want to see his face.” So even though Absalom was back in the city, he and his father still weren’t really together.

🌟 Absalom the Handsome Prince

Now, Absalom was the most handsome man in all of Israel! From the bottom of his feet to the top of his head, he was absolutely perfect—not a single flaw or blemish anywhere. He had the most amazing hair you’ve ever seen! It was so thick and beautiful that once a year, when it got too heavy, he would cut it. And get this—his hair weighed about 5 pounds! That’s like carrying a small bag of flour on your head!ᶜ Absalom had three sons and one daughter. His daughter’s name was Tamar, and she grew up to be very beautiful, just like her father was handsome.

⏰ Two Years of Waiting

Absalom lived in Jerusalem for two whole years without ever seeing his father, the king. Can you imagine living in the same city as your dad but never getting to see him? Absalom was getting frustrated. He decided he needed Joab’s help again, so he sent messengers to Joab saying, “Please come visit me.” But Joab ignored him. Absalom sent another message. Joab ignored that one too!

🔥 The Barley Field Fire

Finally, Absalom came up with a dramatic plan to get Joab’s attention. He told his servants, “See that barley fieldᵈ next to my property? That belongs to Joab. Go set it on fire!” And that’s exactly what they did! Whoosh! The whole field went up in flames! Well, THAT got Joab’s attention! He came storming over to Absalom’s house. “Why did your servants burn my field?” he demanded angrily.

💬 The Final Meeting

Absalom looked at Joab seriously. “Because you wouldn’t come when I called you! Listen, I need you to take a message to the king. Ask him: ‘Why did you even bother bringing me back from Geshur if I can’t see you? I might as well have stayed there! Please, let me come see you. And if I’m still guilty in your eyes, then you can punish me. But at least let me see your face!'” Joab realized Absalom was right. He went to King David and told him everything. Finally, King David agreed. He sent for Absalom. When Absalom came into the throne room, he bowed all the way down to the ground before his father. And then… King David kissed his son! They were reunited at last!

📝 Kid-Friendly Footnotes:

  • Mourning clothes: In ancient times, when someone died, people would wear old, torn, dark clothing and wouldn’t wash or fix their hair for many days to show how sad they were.
  • Geshur: A kingdom far away where Absalom had run away to hide after he killed his brother Amnon. It was his mother’s homeland, so he had family there who protected him.
  • Five pounds of hair: That’s heavier than a big bag of sugar! Absalom’s hair must have been super thick and long—like a prince from a fairy tale. But be careful—later in the Bible, this beautiful hair actually causes him big trouble!
  • Barley field: Barley is a grain like wheat that farmers grew to make bread and feed animals. Burning someone’s field was a serious thing—like destroying their money and food all at once! But Absalom was desperate to get Joab’s attention.
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Footnotes:

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Footnotes:

  • 1
    Now Joab the son of Zeruiah perceived that the king’s heart [was] toward Absalom.
  • 2
    And Joab sent to Tekoah, and fetched thence a wise woman, and said unto her, I pray thee, feign thyself to be a mourner, and put on now mourning apparel, and anoint not thyself with oil, but be as a woman that had a long time mourned for the dead:
  • 3
    And come to the king, and speak on this manner unto him. So Joab put the words in her mouth.
  • 4
    And when the woman of Tekoah spake to the king, she fell on her face to the ground, and did obeisance, and said, Help, O king.
  • 5
    And the king said unto her, What aileth thee? And she answered, I [am] indeed a widow woman, and mine husband is dead.
  • 6
    And thy handmaid had two sons, and they two strove together in the field, and [there was] none to part them, but the one smote the other, and slew him.
  • 7
    And, behold, the whole family is risen against thine handmaid, and they said, Deliver him that smote his brother, that we may kill him, for the life of his brother whom he slew; and we will destroy the heir also: and so they shall quench my coal which is left, and shall not leave to my husband [neither] name nor remainder upon the earth.
  • 8
    And the king said unto the woman, Go to thine house, and I will give charge concerning thee.
  • 9
    And the woman of Tekoah said unto the king, My lord, O king, the iniquity [be] on me, and on my father’s house: and the king and his throne [be] guiltless.
  • 10
    And the king said, Whosoever saith [ought] unto thee, bring him to me, and he shall not touch thee any more.
  • 11
    Then said she, I pray thee, let the king remember the LORD thy God, that thou wouldest not suffer the revengers of blood to destroy any more, lest they destroy my son. And he said, [As] the LORD liveth, there shall not one hair of thy son fall to the earth.
  • 12
    Then the woman said, Let thine handmaid, I pray thee, speak [one] word unto my lord the king. And he said, Say on.
  • 13
    And the woman said, Wherefore then hast thou thought such a thing against the people of God? for the king doth speak this thing as one which is faulty, in that the king doth not fetch home again his banished.
  • 14
    For we must needs die, and [are] as water spilt on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again; neither doth God respect [any] person: yet doth he devise means, that his banished be not expelled from him.
  • 15
    Now therefore that I am come to speak of this thing unto my lord the king, [it is] because the people have made me afraid: and thy handmaid said, I will now speak unto the king; it may be that the king will perform the request of his handmaid.
  • 16
    For the king will hear, to deliver his handmaid out of the hand of the man [that would] destroy me and my son together out of the inheritance of God.
  • 17
    Then thine handmaid said, The word of my lord the king shall now be comfortable: for as an angel of God, so [is] my lord the king to discern good and bad: therefore the LORD thy God will be with thee.
  • 18
    Then the king answered and said unto the woman, Hide not from me, I pray thee, the thing that I shall ask thee. And the woman said, Let my lord the king now speak.
  • 19
    And the king said, [Is not] the hand of Joab with thee in all this? And the woman answered and said, [As] thy soul liveth, my lord the king, none can turn to the right hand or to the left from ought that my lord the king hath spoken: for thy servant Joab, he bade me, and he put all these words in the mouth of thine handmaid:
  • 20
    To fetch about this form of speech hath thy servant Joab done this thing: and my lord [is] wise, according to the wisdom of an angel of God, to know all [things] that [are] in the earth.
  • 21
    And the king said unto Joab, Behold now, I have done this thing: go therefore, bring the young man Absalom again.
  • 22
    And Joab fell to the ground on his face, and bowed himself, and thanked the king: and Joab said, To day thy servant knoweth that I have found grace in thy sight, my lord, O king, in that the king hath fulfilled the request of his servant.
  • 23
    So Joab arose and went to Geshur, and brought Absalom to Jerusalem.
  • 24
    And the king said, Let him turn to his own house, and let him not see my face. So Absalom returned to his own house, and saw not the king’s face.
  • 25
    But in all Israel there was none to be so much praised as Absalom for his beauty: from the sole of his foot even to the crown of his head there was no blemish in him.
  • 26
    And when he polled his head, (for it was at every year’s end that he polled [it]: because [the hair] was heavy on him, therefore he polled it:) he weighed the hair of his head at two hundred shekels after the king’s weight.
  • 27
    And unto Absalom there were born three sons, and one daughter, whose name [was] Tamar: she was a woman of a fair countenance.
  • 28
    So Absalom dwelt two full years in Jerusalem, and saw not the king’s face.
  • 29
    Therefore Absalom sent for Joab, to have sent him to the king; but he would not come to him: and when he sent again the second time, he would not come.
  • 30
    Therefore he said unto his servants, See, Joab’s field is near mine, and he hath barley there; go and set it on fire. And Absalom’s servants set the field on fire.
  • 31
    Then Joab arose, and came to Absalom unto [his] house, and said unto him, Wherefore have thy servants set my field on fire?
  • 32
    And Absalom answered Joab, Behold, I sent unto thee, saying, Come hither, that I may send thee to the king, to say, Wherefore am I come from Geshur? [it had been] good for me [to have been] there still: now therefore let me see the king’s face; and if there be [any] iniquity in me, let him kill me.
  • 33
    So Joab came to the king, and told him: and when he had called for Absalom, he came to the king, and bowed himself on his face to the ground before the king: and the king kissed Absalom.
  • 1
    Now Joab son of Zeruiah perceived that the king’s heart longed for Absalom.
  • 2
    So Joab sent to Tekoa to bring a wise woman from there. He told her, “Please pretend to be a mourner; put on clothes for mourning and do not anoint yourself with oil. Act like a woman who has mourned for the dead a long time.
  • 3
    Then go to the king and speak these words to him.” And Joab put the words in her mouth.
  • 4
    When the woman from Tekoa went to the king, she fell facedown in homage and said, “Help me, O king!”
  • 5
    “What troubles you?” the king asked her. “Indeed,” she said, “I am a widow, for my husband is dead.
  • 6
    And your maidservant had two sons who were fighting in the field with no one to separate them, and one struck the other and killed him.
  • 7
    Now the whole clan has risen up against your maidservant and said, ‘Hand over the one who struck down his brother, that we may put him to death for the life of the brother whom he killed. Then we will cut off the heir as well!’ So they would extinguish my one remaining ember by not preserving my husband’s name or posterity on the earth.”
  • 8
    “Go home,” the king said to the woman, “and I will give orders on your behalf.”
  • 9
    But the woman of Tekoa said to the king, “My lord the king, may any blame be on me and on my father’s house, and may the king and his throne be guiltless.”
  • 10
    “If anyone speaks to you,” said the king, “bring him to me, and he will not trouble you again!”
  • 11
    “Please,” she replied, “may the king invoke the LORD your God to prevent the avenger of blood from increasing the devastation, so that my son may not be destroyed!” “As surely as the LORD lives,” he vowed, “not a hair of your son’s head will fall to the ground.”
  • 12
    Then the woman said, “Please, may your servant speak a word to my lord the king?” “Speak,” he replied.
  • 13
    The woman asked, “Why have you devised a thing like this against the people of God? When the king says this, does he not convict himself, since he has not brought back his own banished son?
  • 14
    For surely we will die and be like water poured out on the ground, which cannot be recovered. Yet God does not take away a life; but He devises ways that the banished one may not be cast out from Him.
  • 15
    Now therefore, I have come to present this matter to my lord the king because the people have made me afraid. Your servant thought, ‘I will speak to the king. Perhaps he will grant the request of his maidservant.
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    For the king will hear and deliver his maidservant from the hand of the man who would cut off both me and my son from God’s inheritance.’
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    And now your servant says, ‘May the word of my lord the king bring me rest, for my lord the king is able to discern good and evil, just like the angel of God. May the LORD your God be with you.’”
  • 18
    Then the king said to the woman, “I am going to ask you something; do not conceal it from me!” “Let my lord the king speak,” she replied.
  • 19
    So the king asked, “Is the hand of Joab behind all this?” The woman answered, “As surely as you live, my lord the king, no one can turn to the right or to the left from anything that my lord the king says. Yes, your servant Joab is the one who gave me orders; he told your maidservant exactly what to say.
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    Joab your servant has done this to bring about this change of affairs, but my lord has wisdom like the wisdom of the angel of God, to know everything that happens in the land.”
  • 21
    Then the king said to Joab, “I hereby grant this request. Go, bring back the young man Absalom.”
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    Joab fell facedown in homage and blessed the king. “Today,” said Joab, “your servant knows that he has found favor with you, my lord the king, because the king has granted his request.”
  • 23
    So Joab got up, went to Geshur, and brought Absalom to Jerusalem.
  • 24
    But the king added, “He may return to his house, but he must not see my face.” So Absalom returned to his own house, but he did not see the king.
  • 25
    Now there was not a man in all Israel as handsome and highly praised as Absalom. From the sole of his foot to the top of his head, he did not have a single flaw.
  • 26
    And when he cut the hair of his head—he shaved it every year because his hair got so heavy—he would weigh it out to be two hundred shekels, according to the royal standard.
  • 27
    Three sons were born to Absalom, and a daughter named Tamar, who was a beautiful woman.
  • 28
    Now Absalom lived in Jerusalem two years without seeing the face of the king.
  • 29
    Then he sent for Joab to send him to the king, but Joab refused to come to him. So Absalom sent a second time, but Joab still would not come.
  • 30
    Then Absalom said to his servants, “Look, Joab’s field is next to mine, and he has barley there. Go and set it on fire!” And Absalom’s servants set the field on fire.
  • 31
    Then Joab came to Absalom’s house and demanded, “Why did your servants set my field on fire?”
  • 32
    “Look,” said Absalom, “I sent for you and said, ‘Come here. I want to send you to the king to ask: Why have I come back from Geshur? It would be better for me if I were still there.’ So now, let me see the king’s face, and if there is iniquity in me, let him kill me.”
  • 33
    So Joab went and told the king, and David summoned Absalom, who came to him and bowed facedown before him. Then the king kissed Absalom.

2 Samuel Chapter 14 Commentary

The Wise Woman’s Parable That Changed a King’s Heart

What’s 2 Samuel 14 about?

This chapter tells the story of how Joab orchestrated an elaborate scheme using a wise woman from Tekoa to tell David a parable that would soften his heart toward his exiled son Absalom. It’s a masterclass in ancient Middle Eastern persuasion and reveals the complex dynamics of justice, mercy, and family relationships in the royal court.

The Full Context

2 Samuel 14 opens with Joab recognizing that King David’s heart was still torn over his son Absalom, who had been in exile for three years after killing his brother Amnon. The political and personal tensions were reaching a breaking point – David needed his son back, but couldn’t figure out how to restore him without appearing to compromise justice. This was more than just family drama; it threatened the stability of the entire kingdom.

The chapter sits at a crucial pivot point in the broader narrative of David’s reign. We’re in the aftermath of the Bathsheba incident and Nathan’s prophecy that “the sword will never depart from your house” (2 Samuel 12:10). The author is showing us how family dysfunction at the highest level creates ripple effects throughout the nation. The literary artistry here is remarkable – we see themes of wisdom versus folly, the tension between justice and mercy, and the power of well-crafted stories to change hearts and minds.

What the Ancient Words Tell Us

The Hebrew word chakam (wise) appears multiple times in this chapter, but it’s not just intellectual cleverness we’re talking about. In the ancient Near East, wisdom was deeply practical – the ability to navigate complex social and political situations with skill. When Joab seeks out a “wise woman” (ishah chakamah), he’s looking for someone with street smarts, emotional intelligence, and rhetorical skill.

The woman’s parable itself is a linguistic masterpiece. She uses the Hebrew root ga’al (kinsman-redeemer) when she talks about her family situation, which would have resonated deeply with David’s understanding of covenant obligations. But here’s where it gets interesting – the same root appears in discussions about blood revenge and family honor.

Grammar Geeks

When the wise woman says “the coal that is left” (gacheleth), she’s using a metaphor that’s both tender and devastating. In Hebrew thought, this represents the last flicker of hope for a family line. David would have immediately understood that extinguishing this “coal” meant ending a family forever.

The woman’s rhetoric builds to a crescendo when she essentially asks David: “If you would preserve my family line, why won’t you preserve your own?” The Hebrew construction here is brilliant – she’s trapped the king in his own sense of justice and mercy.

What Would the Original Audience Have Heard?

Ancient Israelite society was built around clan and family loyalty, but it was also governed by strict justice codes. When someone committed murder, the go’el haddam (blood avenger) had both the right and responsibility to exact vengeance. David’s audience would have immediately recognized the tension the wise woman presented – how do you balance justice with mercy, especially when the survival of a family line hangs in the balance?

They would also have caught the political undercurrents. Absalom wasn’t just David’s son – he was a potential heir to the throne. His continued exile wasn’t just a family matter; it was a constitutional crisis waiting to happen. The people needed to see their king as both just and merciful, and David’s paralysis over Absalom was creating uncertainty about his judgment.

Did You Know?

Tekoa, where the wise woman came from, was famous for producing people with exceptional wisdom and rhetorical skill. It was like the ancient equivalent of sending someone to Harvard Law School – when Joab wanted the best advocate, he knew exactly where to go.

The original audience would have also appreciated the literary artistry of the parable itself. Ancient Middle Eastern culture valued clever storytelling and indirect persuasion. The woman’s approach – starting with a personal story that gradually reveals its deeper meaning – was a respected form of communication, especially when dealing with those in power.

But Wait… Why Did Joab Do This?

Here’s something that might puzzle modern readers: why would Joab, David’s military commander, go to such elaborate lengths to reconcile David with Absalom? After all, Absalom had committed murder – wasn’t justice more important than family reunion?

The answer reveals the complex political calculations of the ancient world. Joab wasn’t just being sentimental; he was being strategic. A kingdom divided against itself cannot stand, and David’s unresolved grief over Absalom was creating instability. But Joab also knew David well enough to understand that the king couldn’t just arbitrarily pardon his son – that would undermine the entire justice system.

So Joab crafted a solution that allowed David to save face while doing what his heart wanted to do anyway. The wise woman’s parable gave David a framework for understanding mercy as a higher form of justice, not a betrayal of it.

Wait, That’s Strange…

Notice that David immediately recognizes Joab’s hand in this scheme (2 Samuel 14:19). This raises an interesting question: if David knew it was manipulation, why did he go along with it? Perhaps because sometimes we need someone else to give us permission to do what we already know is right.

Wrestling with the Text

The most challenging aspect of this chapter is wrestling with the tension between justice and mercy. The wise woman’s parable forces us to ask uncomfortable questions: When does mercy become enabling? When does justice become vengeance? How do we balance the needs of individuals against the needs of society?

David’s response reveals his own internal struggle. He agrees to bring Absalom back, but with conditions – his son can return to Jerusalem but cannot see the king’s face (2 Samuel 14:24). It’s a compromise that satisfies neither justice nor mercy completely, and as we’ll see in subsequent chapters, it creates new problems.

The chapter also raises questions about the ethics of persuasion. Was Joab right to manipulate David, even for a good cause? Was the wise woman complicit in deception, or was she practicing a legitimate form of advocacy? These questions don’t have easy answers, which is part of what makes this narrative so compelling.

“Sometimes the stories we tell reveal more truth than the facts we recite.”

How This Changes Everything

This chapter demonstrates the transformative power of narrative. The wise woman didn’t change David’s mind with logical arguments or emotional appeals – she changed it with a story that helped him see his situation from a new perspective. The parable worked because it allowed David to step outside his own circumstances and judge objectively, then apply that judgment to his own life.

It also shows us something profound about leadership. David’s greatness as a king wasn’t that he never made mistakes or faced impossible dilemmas – it was that he remained open to wisdom, even when it came through unconventional channels. The text subtly suggests that good leaders surround themselves with people who care enough to challenge them, even if it requires elaborate schemes to get their attention.

For modern readers, this chapter offers a masterclass in conflict resolution. Sometimes the direct approach doesn’t work – sometimes you need to help people discover the answer for themselves rather than simply telling them what to do.

Key Takeaway

The most powerful way to change someone’s heart isn’t through argument or manipulation, but through helping them see their situation from a new perspective – often through the mirror of a well-told story.

Further Reading

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